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You are considered a "Domestic Worker". See the California "Domestic Worker Bill of Rights" at this link to see what you are entitled to: https://www.dir.ca.gov/dlse/DomesticWorkerBillOfRights-FAQ.html

"Can meal and lodging credits be applied by an employer against a domestic worker’s wages? Yes. Meal and lodging credits can be applied. However, an employer must abide by the limits specified in Wage Order No. 15. That is, meals or lodging may only be credited against the minimum wage if the employer and the employee enter into a voluntary written agreement before the work is performed. (This requirement applies to all types of domestic workers.)"

Thus, if your employer did not make an agreement with you to subtract meal and lodging from your wages, if you file a wage claim or file a lawsuit, you will be entitled to minimum wage for 9 hrs per day and overtime for anything over 9 hrs per day or over 40 hrs per week.

Also, note that if you report your employer and your employer retaliates by firing you, etc. you have recourse under the law.

I would find someone who knows the work you have done all these years - a personal reference who can vouch to your next employer that you have done above and beyond what is required, or a physician who knows the care you have provided, etc. and extricate yourself from this situation.
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rovana Aug 2021
Thanks. great post.
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It counts if that is what you negotiated - as long as it meets other legal requirements (minimum wage). There certainly is value in room/board). If this is income, you should also be paying taxes.

If, however, you do not agree that this is a fair wage, ...because it is “at will” employment, you can leave any time. If the family is failing to meet legal obligations (paying workers) l, this is not a secure position.
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Sarah3 Jun 2021
This is incorrect. He is in violation of domestic labor laws. If someone requires** the help to live in, the room/ bed they sleep in can NOT be counted toward their salary- even in part - so he is required to cough up payment for her work, sounds like he also owes the relief caregiver payment as well although she quit she could sue for unpaid wages
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Doesn't seem like you're telling the whole story. In the beginning did you agree to this arrangement? Are you a LEGAL US citizen?
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Sarah3 Jun 2021
???
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whether you get paid or not, you cannot keep up doing what you are doing.
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California is an odd place in terms of laws and wages. Many cities have their own wage requirements so it is complicated.

I am going to assume that son will say you are not an employee but a "volunteer caregiver."

So in your case, California has a domestic caregiver coalition. Here is the link:

https://www.cadomesticworkers.org/

It tells you wages of your area, etc. If I were you, I would reach out to them for assistance.
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Sarah3 Jun 2021
That son is a, well I can’t use that kind of language here. He’s a very selfish entitled person who clearly sees it as his right to exploit others, is disgusting. I hope the op let him know already she requires full payment for this past month otherwise quitting. She doesn’t owe him any notice he owes her months of back pay, a huge apology at a minimum to go forward
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What did you agree upon initially? I wouldn’t consider living there as payment. If you are hired as an employee, you deserve a paycheck. Does the person that hired you consider living there as payment?

Did you have permission to hire the other person? If you did, why wasn’t she paid? Do you want to remain there as an employee? It doesn’t sound like a feasible option to me. What else do they provide? Food?

This is a confusing posting. Can you please give more details so people can respond. There is absolutely no way that you can keep up this pace. Sleep deprecation is brutal. Plus, how can you properly care for someone if you aren’t caring for yourself?
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NeedHelpWithMom Jun 2021
I hate autocorrect. It’s as stupid as Siri at times! 😆 LOL Should read SLEEP DEPRIVATION! Geeeeeez, we have to proofread what we typed correctly to make sure autocorrect didn’t screw up!
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How innocent you sound. How helpless and confused! 24/7? Do you sleep at least? Oh Boy, if you want to tabulate 24/7 even on a $10 an hour: $240 a day multiplied by 30=$7200? But private care is a little more than $10 an hour. How can a person maintain a 24/7 schedule defies all logic, not too mention the constraint on the body and mind. Just doesn’t add up as one would eventually collapse under such pressure. Best of everything, though.
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kas15 Jun 2021
Your reply is not helpful and snarky. Please consider being kind when you reply to someone who is obviously burned out. I am a live-in caregiver and regardless of what you say 24/7 is exactly how I *feel*. I am woken up during the night all times of the night, I am sleep-deprived and burned out. Isn't it obvious that this person is struggling? Someone is reaching out for help and needs support not being made to feel worse. Best of everything, though.
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I am in the same position so I know what you're saying. I look at it by how much would it cost me to live somewhere else? How much money could I make in a regular job. My free rent also includes utilities, car insurance, cable, internet... you get the idea. I DO, however, get paid for extra things, like paperwork and help with things that would fail outside of the range of care. Usually, by the hour, I make around a dollar which with all the rest I mentioned is good pay. You should not go penniless altho many people with dimensia are older and remember the days when they raised a large family on a hundred a month and believe they're being generous. Ask. Hopefully, the worst that would happen is they might say no. Good luck. A church may be a great place to look for a "friend" for your person to come visit and give you a break.
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The fact the woman’s son also refused to pay the relief help you hired shows this is intentional exploitation on his part, pls update us how your doing, have you decided to demand payment or quit or another route?
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I take care of my 91 year old mom who can still manage somewhat. She dresses herself, cleans herself in the shower (I'm close by in case I need to help), brushes her teeth, does her makeup, dresses herself. She can still walk but does have a bad knee and is a huge fall risk. I have to use her lightweight wheelchair, which is wonderful, if we go out. We were living in my house and I decided I wanted to sell one of the homes and decided on mine. We moved to her house and I think she has been happier around her own things. She pays my bills and I live here free. She doesn't have a mortgage, No other bills other than utilities. But I clean her big house, cook a good hot meal every night, I do her laundry, I take her to every doctor's appointment, to getting her nails and hair done. I haven't had any of my three brothers give me a break in 17 months and all I wanted to do is go to lunch with a friend and go to my house and take a very long nap where it is so quiet. I am sure I am still on the short end of the stick but I'm keeping up two houses now, two appointment calendars, two sets of bills, two yards to keep up, etc. Tons of calls and then to keep track of it all. You certainly do deserve to live there free and get paid on top of it. My mom had two girls prior to myself and she paid them and they spent the night on certain nights. She paid them 11.00 and hour. They got paid for it and my mom fed them. They had to cook but my mom is an excellent cook and she taught one of them how to cook the way she did. This person was a thief and stole my mom's money out of her wallet, medications, jewelry, so much. The last thing I found missing were all her gorgeous antique German Santa's s and Christmas decorations. I put the tree up and was so excited to be hanging up all her lovely decorations and all gone. I was so livid and my mom was so sad. You are working for free. If she had a sitter she would have to pay 17.00 an hour or more and some of them work a double shift. 16 hours a day. No sitter would stay a minute with an elderly person and not get paid. They are taking advantage of you dear. Ask them for money.
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gdaughter Aug 2021
I so understand and can relate to what you said. NOTHING IS FREE. You are on call 24/7 365. I do similarly what you do and you didn't even mention the banking, No one, unless they have or are doing it appreciates the amount of time invested in this routine caregiving....how long we are on hold just to make an appt. OR the time it takes to keep records, pay bills, just in general handling the details of life. WE/you are also on emergency call to respond should something happen. I'm not sure my deaf father would be aware if an alarm went off and have caught the coffee pot left in ON position or the disposal running....we imo, are worth our weight and then some in platinum!
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the problem here just may be that the son does not care about his mother safety, life or well being. I knew of situations where some elderly needed help but the family refused to step in. This elderly was diabetic with heart condition and the family did nothing with their parent getting into accidents weekly and found passed out in the middle of intersections monthly. Their parent was a danger to themself and the entire community and the family was only concerned with their inheritance.
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rovana Aug 2021
Why didn't someone make the mother of all stinks? Cops, APS, local media, etc.
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It sounds like the son either can't afford to pay for the lady who cared for his demented mother or he just didn't care. I definitely think you should get paid.
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Yes you should get paid, receive holiday pay and have time off to do what you want with your friends. Don't you have work regulations and minimum wage salary in California ? you need money for clothes, toilet and to go out with friends, Why haven't you looked for another job?
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Of course you should get paid. There are, after all, labor laws. And rent free will not cut it for the full-time care you are providing. (By the way I hope the previous worker went to the Labor Board to get justice.) I mean, time to land on these people claws unsheathed. If the family don't care, then time to get the help of Adult Protective Services in getting care for a vulnerable senior.
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This post is from June. Hopefully the OP has done something by now.
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I paid caregivers $25/hour in Southern California three years ago. At that rate, you're owed right around $657,000.

Contact the state labor board and see if you have any kind of case. Absent an actual employment contract, you might be hard-pressed to get that kind of money from the son, but I have a feeling you can put together some kind of case using receipts, witnesses, and recreating time cards to account for the time you've been there.
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