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glasshalffull, you got that right. I feel like I need to sneak by my parents house to go to anywhere.... if my parents see my vehicle go by [their house is on the main circle of the subdivision] they are curious where I went.

Many times it's not my vehicle as there is an identical 1996 Jeep the same color as mine, and another 1996 Jeep the same color as my sig other here in our subdivision. I mean, what are the odds of that. So my parents will get them mixed up with our vehicles.
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I miss being able to decide what I want to do and when.
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Daddysgirl513, I can truly relate to your post today. I have been missing my daily routine and the few hobbies I have been able to maintain in between running back and forth from my home to my parents' home. I am so grateful that my parents are able to live in their own home for now.
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Jessie, I know how you feel. Never was a great socialite, either. My sig other and I are the oldest on our cul-de-sac. At least he doesn't yell outside "Get off my lawn, kid".

My parents live in the same subdivision and are the oldest. Their next door neighbors on either side are from a far off land, different cultures, different religions, and my parents won't socialize with anyone not of their same culture or religion.... sad, my parents are missing out on so much :(
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I don't know about others, but I miss my "others" time. I have so much me time around here. Mom watches TV all day while I do the chores, meds, shopping, etc. Sometimes it seems like it is all me -- me doing this and me doing that. My mother is lost in the TV and often gets mad if I interrupt the Waltons to talk to her. We live in a neighborhood of 20-something year olds with babies, so there's no neighbors to visit back and forth. I have to go places to look for people closer to my own age. Sometimes I feel pretty pathetic, having to go look for friends. I have never been a great socialite, but I have never been this alone before. It is awful. I feel like I am 100 years old already socially.
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I miss my me time too. We live rural and when the weather is nice, I try to get up before my spouse just to go on the deck and look at the trees by myself.
He is a sweetheart but had an accident developed some health issues and cannot be left alone any longer . I feel like we are attached at the hip.
It seems sometimes I am selfish with my me time but I cannot help it.
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For me, *me time* is time at work where it is the only place I am not constantly thinking about my aging parents [90+] who still live alone in their own home.

Never in my wildest dreams would I had ever thought working outside the home would be a *vacation* :P
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I am usually awake by 4 am listening to footsteps and waiting for falls while staying in bed. Up about 6:30, hoping for an hour with my tea and newspaper. Drives me batty if i do not get at least an hour to myself.
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That's a good idea, JessieBelle. He does like to dance.
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Many older men enjoy learning to dance. If they find themselves a "dance partner" it opens up a new avenue of life. Many areas have dance lessons at the senior centers. This is particularly good for men, since more ladies are looking for partners than there are men.
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littletonway, there are senior day programs in our community but he is never interested in going unless I can go with him. I feel like, in his mind, I've replaced his wife. I'm always trying to be so respectful towards my dad, that sometimes I just can't find a way to say what I should. He's lived with us for a year now and I think it's time I try to find some way to set some ground rules, but don't know where to start because I don't want to make him unhappy.
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You are not alone! That was the most difficult for me when my Mother lived with us. I went from doing lots of volunteer work, lunches with friends, projects galore to always being on call 24/7. Found myself getting up early to just sit outside alone for an hour or so. Finally hired a companion for Mom for 5 hours a day twice a week and kept my sanity.

Check with your local senior services group or home health care provider for services your Dad might be eligible for. Is there a day program nearby for him to attend? Many of them provide bus service, depending on the size of your community. Do you have family that might give you a day off or at least a few hours a day each week? How about a weekend off every month?

You must take care of yourself and your own family first! Your emotional and physical health will be affected by caregiving if you don't put yourself first!
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