Follow
Share
Read More
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
Bring in Hospice to get an evaluation.

medicare will pay for hospice in home care. So, it will relieve the burden of doctors visits, and the cost of all the supplies needed for her care,

I believe you really need to see a consult with an attorney that specializes in Medicaid and elder care. You might just find that it is the best way to protect your parents financial capabilities to conserve some for your Dad. Or, you might find that it will leave him unable to be certain of paying the cost of his own care. Either way, you can’t make an informed decision without knowing how the cost of care (home or NH) will impact your Dad.
Helpful Answer (9)
Report
PAlynn Dec 2019
Thank you for your comments. He has a lawyer that we went to see a few years ago. I need to get back in touch with him and ask for his advice.
(3)
Report
See 1 more reply
Promises made in youth, when one is healthy, seldom come to fruition. It sounded good at the time, but today, it is not a doable option.

Talk to him about doing the right thing for her, being placed somewhere she can get 24/7 care, tended to by clinically trained people. By not doing this, he is being selfish and obviously not using good judgement.

I wish you the best, keep talking to him.
Helpful Answer (7)
Report
PAlynn Dec 2019
Thank you. He and my mother did not have good experiences with nursing homes with their parents 30 years ago. That is where this is all coming from. We need to have more discussions about it and try to figure out what will be best.
(5)
Report
See 1 more reply
My mom had 24\7 care at home, with private pay caregivers “off the street”. Like your parents, mine were not wealthy, just scrimped & saved their entire lives. Hiring around the clock care isn’t easy & even not going through an agency is still quite expensive.

My mom’s case is different from yours because she was already a widow when needing care & wasn’t pulling our Dad down by staying in the home. While we spent every penny of her money to keep her home before she had to go to a nursing home, we did NOT have to make sure she had enough financial resources left for any care our Dad might need.

You’ve got a lot to think about & I know this is really tough for you & your Dad. Sending hugs your way.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report
PAlynn Dec 2019
Thank you. I just feel like I am failing....at everything. I can't keep up with it anymore. I hate to admit defeat but I am so worried about his health. I don't know how much more he can take.
(2)
Report
???? Diagnosed with what "may or may not" be colon cancer? That's not a diagnosis, that's an educated guess! I hope your mother's doctor is working on giving you a little more clarity as soon as possible.

However; would you consider, and could you persuade your father to consider, a hospice evaluation? An evaluation would not commit you to anything, but it would give you guidance as to where you all stand at the moment and an objective assessment of your mother's care needs.
Helpful Answer (9)
Report
PAlynn Dec 2019
Countrymouse, they did a CT scan when she was in the ER. They saw "something", a shading on the scan that appeared to be in her colon but without a colonscopy, they can't be sure if it is cancer. Of course we aren't going to put her through that. Keep her comfortable is what they said. I plan to call her dr on Monday and ask for direction. They ER doctor mentioned hospice, but no one has said any more about it. We had home health coming in but they discharged her last week.
(2)
Report
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter