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I heard some live over 10 yrs with Alzheimer’s.I feel guilty asking but when should ALF be considered. Don’t want to spend funds unnecessarily beforehand on perhaps in home help if the ALF will be needed for an extended period.

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I’m sorry to hear that your husband has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease.

I’m sure that you have many questions on your mind.

Your profile says that your husband is 72 years old and that you have retired to care for him. Is he in the beginning stages or is he further along?

Are you having difficulty managing his care at home? Do you have help with his care? Is he fairly self sufficient or does he need help with most things?

How are you doing since you have retired to care for your husband?

I can understand that you are trying to reserve funds. Facility care is expensive. Knowing when to place someone is individual for everyone. Can you share a few more details about your lives?

Wishing you peace while you sort through the best options for you and your husband.
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You know when it is time when you have reached a point when you say "I can't do this"
You know what your "line in the sand" is.
For me it was SAFETY.
I said I would keep my Husband at home as long as it was safe for ME to care for HIM and as long as it was safe for HIM for ME to care for him.
I was very lucky. I had the help of the equipment that Hospice provided when I needed it. I am in a Handicap Accessible house. And he was compliant so I did not have the battles that many others have had.
So...I was able to keep him at home.
My Husband survived about 12 years after his diagnosis of Alzheimer's (I do think he also had Vascular Dementia though)

I also suggest that you consider Memory Care rather than AL MC is secure where most AL are not. Smaller population of residents to staff in MC.

In the meantime some of these will help you
Adult Day Programs. If there are any take advantage. Gives you a break, gives him a break.
Caregivers at least 2 days a week. Gets him used to someone else and you can use the help and a way to get away for a bit.
If he is a Veteran contact your local Veterans Assistance Commission, the VFW or American Legion to see what he may qualify for as far as benefits from the VA. (as a caregiving spouse you can now get paid to care for him)
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You care for him as long as it is working for you both. The minute things get out of balance with one of you it's time to be looking and acting.
However like already mentioned I don't believe assisted living will be the answer for you or him. Instead it will be memory care.
And yes sadly if your husband was diagnosed with Alzheimer's that is the slowest progressing of the dementias and can go on for 20+ years.
A gentleman in my caregiver support group just lost his wife in July of this year from early onset Alzheimer's and she was in year 21 of having it.
It's a horrible disease(all the dementias are)with no happy ending in sight.
I wish you strength, courage and peace as you take this very hard journey with your husband.
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