Follow
Share

So back in January I posted that my Mother had passed and that I was worried because I have been living with her to help her for years and was afraid I would be kicked out of the house because she had to go on Mainecare. What I did not mention is that I have a loser brother who abandoned us years ago because he wanted me to put her in a facility years ago. I had not spoken to him for at least 5 years but the day she passed I was at the hospital and texted him to let him know that she was seriously ill. He didn’t seem to be bothered by it and when I informed him later in the day all I got from him was "OK thanks for letting me know." I heard not one other word until last week when he texted wanting to know what had been resolved about the house and the will. No asking about when she would be buried or anything else from a compassionate standpoint. I am very stressed about this.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
You may not like him, for good reasons, but you have to face the fact that he is your mother’s son and has a justifiable interest in asking about her estate. Have you done anything about settling things up? If not, you clearly need to. If you tell us more (eg what in fact is happening with a will and the house) we might be able to be helpful (eg how to get started). If you have done nothing, then in your shoes I would not reply to brother, but go ahead immediately with the legalities that are needed. He will be less able to interfere if you have everything in train and under control. Don’t stress, do what’s needed to be done.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

What problems do you foresee?
What problems can he possibly cause for you?
Were you the executor of the will? Has the Estate been settled? Were you left anything? Was he NOT left anything?
Our answer will depend on this. Clearly he isn't a very nice man, so it can be foreseen that he is now looking for cash. If there wasn't any cash then that's quite an easy answer. If there was cash or there was a will and the estate was settled then let him know the will was filed for probate and he is welcome to go read it.
We need more from you in order to answer.
How are you doing, other than the troublesome bro?
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

awful brother. i hope you find good solutions fast, dear OP.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

This kind of thing happens all the time, sadly.

Treat him like a distant relative. Have the will/trust enacted and give him his portion if he is to receive anything. Ignore his complaints (sounds like he probably will make trouble) and wash your hands of him.

You've not had a relationship with him for years, just kind of keep that going. Hopefully, mother's wishes will be simple and clear. He fights you on anything, refer him to your lawyer, if you have one.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Well. No one can accuse him of hypocrisy. He hasn't even pretended to be grief-stricken about his mother or concerned about how you're doing, has he.

And his question is legitimate: what is the status of the house now that your mother has passed away? The routine situation, I believe, would be that Mainecare will now begin the MERP process and, depending on your entitlements (you may have acquired rights to remain living in the house, for example), will take part of the proceeds when your mother's house is sold. Any remaining capital will be divided between your mother's children unless your mother left a will stating otherwise.

So I'm not sure what problems your brother can cause, because it depends what the situation is and what directions your mother gave. What are they?
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

If you have not received a recovery letter from Mainecare you need to call Moms caseworker and get a phone # for them. Your Moms house is now an asset that they can recover what they put out on her care. Who inherits the house may not be an issue because it maybe worth less than the money they put out. You may need to sell it to pay Mainecare's lien. If Mom incurred any debt or other liens, they will need to be satisfied first and then Mainecare gets their share.

You being able to stay there maybe determined by if you lived with Mom to take care of her, did you reside there before she was placed, are you disabled. You may also need to prove you can pay upkeep on the house, utilities and taxes. These are questions you ask the Recovery Dept. Be aware, if allowed to stay, the lien will still be placed. It will need to be satisfied if you die, if u leave or sell.

Was there a Will leaving the house to you both? Not sure how this will work out with Mainecare involved. Another question for Recovery. If no Will thats another thing where the State gets involved with who inherits. Probably u and brother but that has to be established.

So, you need to start with Recovery before you can make any decisions concerning the house.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

It sounds possible that no-one from Medicaid has contacted you, and you are hoping that you can just stay in the house permanently without anyone questioning it. The chances of this happening are very slim. You are better off knowing the genuine situation, and having time (and probably assistance) to deal with it.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I didn't read your earlier post, but here's the wording from the MaineCare estate recovery website if that would be of any help. It won't, of course, help with the situation with your brother, but if these apply to you it may help you retain the ability to live in the house--but you would of course have to have adequate income for taxes, maintenance, etc.

Waivers from Recovery
Maine offers two options for MaineCare members to seek a waiver from full estate recovery of MaineCare payments. MaineCare deducts the amount of the waiver granted from the value of the estate assets.
These two waivers options are:
1. “Care Given” Waiver
Heirs who provided care for the MaineCare member while living in the member’s home for at least two years prior to the member being admitted to a long-term care facility or death may seek a waiver from recovery. The heir must have an income below 200% of the federal poverty level.

The amount waived from recovery depends on the level and type of home care the heir provided.
For each of the two years:
▪ $6,000 is waived for basic help at least three times a week with transportation,
housekeeping, appointments, and daily in-home personal care.
▪ $12,000 is waived for care that includes the above plus dispensing medications, changing dressings, and bathing.
▪ $32,000 is waived if the level of care is personal care that would have been
provided in an institutional setting.

2. Hardship Waiver
If full recovery of MaineCare’s claim will create an undue hardship, heirs may request a hardship waiver. The heirs’ income and assets combined must be below 180% of federal poverty level, and they must have lived in the member’s home for a period of at least two years prior to the member's death.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter