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Hello I'm 1 daughter who is in a legal issue. My sister moved my mom and my mom's abusive husband into her home.
They used to live next door to me ..
I seen the abuse from moms husband getting worse and mom never came outside anymore .
Sister puts a restraing on me.court in 5 months to try and reverse it .
I have no money for lawyer ,my sister does . I feel defeated and need help to get my mom back .

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I have no good answer all I know is caregiving is so hard on families.

So many families just end all ties after there parents pass.

Sometimes the parents play each child and cause the tension. Sometimes it's over money

Right now I've been dealing with my sister who never helps but calls mom and tells her all her really horrible problems, getting her upset.

So you are not alone by any means.

If you could give us some more information it would be helpful to answer better. Best of luck
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Reply to Anxietynacy
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More siblings at war.
Our third post this a.m. about siblings causing dissention for helpless parents, and at this point I am just so over the pain that is caused to parents by this activity of their children.

As you might guess, we cannot know the details of why a restraining order was issued in regards to you. And even if we DID have your story, we would have one side. So I guess we can but trust the courts to do their work.

I am sorry for all your pain, and even sorrier for your parents. But this is a legal issue for the courts in your area, and a Forum of total strangers can only issue words of sympathy and best wishes to you and your family. You might call APS and ask if they will do a wellness check if you fear for your mother, but the fact that you have a restraining order issued against you may preclude their investigations.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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I am dealing with the same situation . I was with My Dad for 15 years and his home was My Base for 22 years and he was My Best friend . We Live in Boston and My sister tried getting Money May 2022 . She arrived his wallet disappeared . She did some other horrific stuff and we both got Covid from her . She left after 3 days . A social worker called APS in My caregiver support group . While My Dad and I were in Maine where we go every summer she called APS claiming " My Father Had disappeared and she didnt Know where he was ? " I Got a Nasty call from them and said " My Dad Is in the Bathroom and we are In Maine . " My sister seems to do this every time we go to Maine because she Is Jealous even though I Invited her and her daughter to come with us . I made the Mistake of Inviting them twice to Our house so I could get to Know My Niece . ( BIG MISTAKE ) Anyway there is a heat wave in Boston 95 - 100 degress of course that's when the AC Goes Out and all 3 fans break and I contacted Task Rabbit and got the Last AC Unit at Home Depot . 2 African American woman show up Banging on My Door treating Me Like I am a criminal " Do you drug your Father ? , Do you steal Large Sums of Money ? , Do You Isolate Your father ? " I said " why dont you talk to My father because all of this is coming form My sisters Mouth . I still have Covid and am sick and Have a acupuncture appointment to make in Cambridge . " These woman grilled me for a Hour and a Half in 95 degree heat . They Leave . One case worker calls me around September 2022 " We Can get you a over Night caregiver for you to attend your grand sons Birthday in Washington DC " I said " No My sister will be arriving then . No Thank You . " and Of course she Knew My schedule and when The CNA would arrive and I would go do the food shopping , and errands . I come home and My sister is screaming In the Kitchen and Video recording Me . She Has been Violent with me before and been on drugs . I say to her " I Can get you a hotel room and If you dont stop screaming I am calling 911 . " My father Begs me " Not to Call 911 " I should Have called 911 . I Call a friend and he says " She is Looking for Money Let her get the Money and Leave . " I Lock Myself in My room for 2 days because she is a Tyrant . I hear her showering the front door closes and I run down the stairs . My father is gone But His cane , shoes, clothes are still there - but all the House keys are Missing , His Passport, His accounting and all Important documents . I run to the Police with a social worker and they call her . " we are going on a Little vacation to Hawaii and are Boarding the Plane . " My Father can Not walk with Out His cane . My Son says " Mom do a wellness check later with the Carlsbad Police to see if she brought him to her house . " There is a 3 hour time difference . Sure enough he is in California and Has been there for a year and 8 Months . I could go On and on But basically she said " Come get him " and I did and went with a Police escort . They took out a restraining Order against me and lied and would Not let me see or speak with My Dad . My advice is Let it Go . The Only thing you can do is Contact APS and let them Know they are Not letting you see her . There can be supervised visits . Another thing you can do is file for conservatorship . is there Legal Aid Near you for Low income people ? The restraining Order Move is real Low class stuff . I spoke with a Lawyer at Harvard Law school " Karen is it really worth it ? " She woke me up . No It isn't worth it . he is 3000 Miles away and I dont Have $50,000 nor do I Like dealing with Low class people who Lie and are on drugs . My advice get a therapist to support you but you do Have the right to supervised visits . I would get on with My Life . Court is traumatic and stressful and No one wins . End of story - there are No winners only Losers if you have to stoop that Low in a Family .
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Reply to KNance72
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"Sister puts a restraing on me.court in 5 months to try and reverse it."

Sorry, I don't understand this sentence. Not sure if you need a lawyer for a restraining order. You just go to court and state why a restraining order should not be placed against you. What is sister claiming against you? And not sure if she can keep u away from Mom if Mom is competent to make her own decisions. Why did she take them in?
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Can you please give more information on this situation in order to receive answers.

There are a few blanks that need filling in. Thanks, and best of luck to you.

It’s sad to be in a situation like this. Unfortunately, problems often arise between siblings and parents are stuck in the middle of it.

Other times, it’s the parents that are the instigators, because they play one child against the other one, which will inevitably lead to confusion and trouble.
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Reply to NeedHelpWithMom
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